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If It's Meant To Be Part 4

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Until I find this situation getting worse as time goes by. My cousin didn’t want me to be his girlfriend. Because she is afraid that Lance would just play on me for what she did and what I did to him before. But even though it’s like that I didn’t feel any doubt at him. I feel his sincerity to the every word he is telling to me. And then I my cousin asking me about us. On what level do our relationship goes. I tell the truth that I didn’t avoid him. I still his bestfriend. Lance always fetch me, phone me and he became sweeter to me. I realized that I feel the same way too. I just woke up one time realizing that I LOVE him too. But I don’t have the guts to tell him about it.

Then my birthday comes. My 18th birthday. And of course I invited him. And he accept it.

On my birthday party…
He came with flowers and cake. And my cousin saw it. She is not happy about it. But I don’t mind her. I’m happy that he came. He is my escort for the night. After the party he talks to me.
Lance: I feel uncomfortable with your cousin.
Elly: why? Just don’t mind her.
Lance: because you know. It’s really not a good thing to see us together because she is my ex and they thinking that I’m going to hurt you-
Elly: is it affect you that much? Coz you know the decision is still yours. If you are affected by it that much just tell me. And if I were to be ask, I wont be affected coz for me “past is past”.
Lance: no, im not affected.
Elly: (i notice that there is a doubt on Lance’s face but I decided not to mind it) ok. cheer up!
Lance: ok..

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The night is over. Lance went home at 11pm. I said my thanks to him. And I went to bed.

I feel something is not normal. After my birthday, Lance didn’t call me and fetch me. And I’m getting sad as day passes. And I think so many negative things. But one thing just record to my mind, it is that he changed his mind. I think that maybe he is affected by the situation that much. And as I thinking about it, I can’t help but to cry. I feel so much pain. But I can’t blame him. I decided to forget him also although it is hard for me cause I already love him. I didn’t have the chance to tell him about it.

One day I was walking on the street, then I saw him with his car. And he saw me too.Then he stop his car with doubt. I didn’t smile. Think my face is just plane. But I think that I should ask him what is happening so at least I’m prepared and I wont hope that much.

Elly: hey, don’t you love me anymore?
Lance: (surprise) what do you mean?
Elly: you are not like lance I know. You’re not calling me anymore nor fetching me.
Lance: ah..i’m just busy.. sorry bout that. And my phone is missing again, and I don’t have time to buy new one.
Elly: just… just tell me if you change your mind and heart, so it’s not hurting me too much. At least just let me know.(with sad face)
Lance: no, sweetheart (his face with concern and care)
Elly: its ok with me. (then the rain comes)

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Lance didn’t know that I have fever that time. Then the rain comes. I don’t know why but I suddenly fall down. I just feel the hand that catch me and I don’t know what happened after that. I just wake up on a room. White room, then I saw Lance sleeping beside me. And then the surrounding became clearer and clearer. Now I know. I am on the hospital. And I saw the clock. Its already 1am. It means I was lying down in bed for more than 7 hours. Then Lance woke up.

Lance: God, you’re awake,(then he hug me so tight) why didn’t you tell me that you have a high fever?(worried)
Elly: I forgot to tell you. I was occupied bout… (didn’t continue but lance get it)
Lance: I know its my fault. Sorry baby if I turn you down this passed days. Sorry, I just did it to try if I cant forget you.
Elly: why/
Lance: because I’m afraid that you would listened to your cousin and realize that they are right and just leave me. I’m afraid also that it will affect you also so im the one who initiates to stay away. But God knows how hard it is for me. Every day im thinking of you, if you are ok or safe. I’m always praying that God will guide you and take care of you. But I can’t I was about to fetch you a while ago but I decided not to, until you saw me and I saw you. When I saw you falling down I’m so afraid. I thought of many things. Like I will lost you forever without saying how much I love you. Without saying sorry. I feel like I will be alone for the rest of my life. I don’t know how would be my life living without you.(then he hugged me with so much affection)
Elly: (crying).. i… don’t know what to say.. I’m so depressed. I thought you don’t love me and don’t want to see me. I feel helpless coz for second time, I wont be able to tell you again one thing.
Lance: what is it?
Elly: I thought I wont be able to tell you that… I love you too.. (crying)
Lance: really? Are you serious? Is that true?(hug elly again) and then smiling
Elly: yes!!
Lance: since when?
Elly: I don’t know I just knew it.
Lance: I love you so much.

Then he kissed me and we decided to fight for what we are having and to not be affected by one thing. We knows what we are looking for. Coz we are looking at on thing. That is to take care of each other till the end.


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