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My First Love Story
My Life Part 2

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2 days into our relationship, he took my first kiss. Not to mention, he was the first guy i hugged & held hands with. I never regretted.

I put all my trust in him. I went to his place a few occasions, & nothing happened. His family welcomed me, they are nice.

2 weeks later into the relationship, he forced himself on me in his home. I cried, & tried to push him away. It didn't help. In the end, i stopped struggling. All because i loved him a lot.

Things started to change. He became abusive - orally & physically. He hurled vulgarities at me for no good reason. He whacks me whenever there's an argument. Sometimes, i told myself it's enough & everything should stop.

But i always thought back of those times that he was there for me whenever i needed him, & continued staying by his side.

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Few years later, he cheated on me. He bedded with other girls & i found out about it. I was upset & initiated a break-up. He said,
"you better stay with me, or else you'll see what happened to your family."
I was scared, of course. & i had no one to turn to.

My relatives & grandparents always asks me why do i have so many bruises on me. But i couldn't tell them.

He continued the hurling of vulgarities & whackings. Until one day, i told my aunt everything. I told her he cheated on me as well, but i decided to close an eye about it. She was furious & told my dad. My dad of course, was upset. He has never whacked me before, & this young guy is whacking his daughter. I told him i'm fine, & that he don't have to worry.

Everything continues, & soon the arguments got worse. He would hit me with chairs, grabbed me by my arm and swing me around. On better times, there'll only be kicks & slaps.

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I cried, but has never laid a finger on him & stupidly, i was always the one to apologize.

Whenever he said 1, i can never say 2. When he said yes, i can never say no. I had no rights.

But to him, he always feels that he dotes on me a lot. He always thinks that i can never do without him. & sadly, i was as dumb as he thought i am.

I was once pregnant with his child. I told him about it, & he told me to go for abortion asap. He said he didn't want the child. He calls it a "bastard". He claims that this child is a jinx.

I was heartbroken, but still went for the abortion. He was there, paid for everything. But so what ? I lost my child. Just a day before my abortion, i told him,
"don't ever forget that this is your decision."
& i touched my tummy & said, "it's not me who doesn't want to keep you, it's your father who doesn't want you."

I gave up everything, for this one person. My family, my poly studies, my baby. & this one person thought he gave me the world, but didn't.

Whatever it is girls, love yourself. I've regretted. Don't let your vision be blurred by love.


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Next on My Life Part 1 | 2