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Story Of Love And Hate
Serendipity Part 4

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Then on my birthday she sends me a mail with a movie she’d made. It was beautiful, and it was the start of something new. At least that’s what I thought. My feelings towards her weren’t changed, but her feelings towards me weren’t the same anymore. Because I had a relationship. On top of that I was impatient, always pushing things while I should have waited for the right moment, the right time. So I kept on writing, and expressing my feelings. While I should have listened to her heart. I couldn’t accept the fact that everything had changed since the day I confessed that I had a relationship for several years. Now for her birthday I send her flowers, made her a movie with pictures of me and the most beautiful quotes I could possibly find. While I could write whole letters for her, I couldn’t even write one sentence for my own girlfriend. With my girlfriend I’m this whole other person, while I was writing her I was always myself. Since the day I got her flowers, we were talking about finally meeting each other. Which we did. Altough I felt timing wasn’t right I went to meet her. And it was not the night we had imagined ourselves for months. Again I was pushing things, and lacked patience. Despite the fact that last time wasn’t exactly what we dreamed of, we decided to meet once again. And so we did. I went home early because she had this headache. But never had the feeling that this would be the last time we’d see each other. On Saturday she sent me an ecard mentioning it wasn’t me and that she wasn’t feeling well, that she would write me a mail in the week to come. I wasn’t thinking about saying goodbye.

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Monday February 2nd she walked away, said that her feelings towards me weren’t going to change anymore. After the first time we met, she explained me that her feelings weren’t the same as the feelings I had. And stupid me, always impatient, and pushing things said that if she hadn’t feelings for me it would be better to say goodbye. While she was always saying that we needed to let time do all the work. She needed time to get to know me she said. The fact is we never took that time. And she walked out. Saying goodbye once more… and stopped writing from that moment. It was really hard for me, ‘cause I still believe that she’s the one. And that the fact that we met, wasn’t just an accident.

(Related Story : New Love Story)

For weeks I’m asking myself, why’d faith let us meet, when there’s no way we could ever be together? Why did I meet this incredible girl, who’s almost exactly the same as I am, with the same interests, the one person who seems to understand and know me better than anyone I’ve ever met? On a moment that my life was partially written, and on an moment where we were thinking about getting married after the construction works of our apartment were finished… Is it a sign? Were the things that I encountered during the time we wrote, were all little signs? The commercial with her name, my banker’s daughter (with the same name) which had my cousins’ boyfriend as her teacher, her name in magazine’s, on the radio, on tv... Once we were talking about the movie Serendipity… the week after we noticed they were playing the movie on tv. And this wasn’t the only thing…

 

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